Some days I can’t cook anything right. I’ve learned to deal with cooking disasters after having many! After all, it’s just cheese straws.
With nearly 100 cookie recipes, and dozens of desserts, snacks, and breakfast recipes on this site, one could get the idea that I am a never-ending stream of culinary brilliance.
I realize that you probably didn’t have that idea. But I’m going to pretend you did.
The eternal scroll of gorgeous photos on Pinterest makes it feel like everyone else in the world lives in this idealized Utopian home, where the cupboards are always organized, the vases always have fresh flowers, the craft projects are beautiful and unique, and the food always reaches a nirvana-like perfection. Then I look at my life: my overcrowded and poorly designed cupboards, my sad looking crafts and my empty vases.
And, to tell you the honest truth, my food basically never reaches Nirvana. Well, almost never.
In fact, sometimes the food isn’t fit to feed to cats. And you know how I feel about cats.
I really struggled with what gorgeous recipe to post for you today. I racked my brain. I asked my friends. I asked my kids. I asked my kids friends. (I really was that desperate.) My sister even sent me a long list of really fantastic ideas, which I’m sure will all make it on here at some point.
I just wasn’t “feeling” any of them, though. I wasn’t in the mood for deviled eggs, or naan, or spinach cheese dip.
And I’m never not in the mood for spinach cheese dip.
These cheese straws sounded pretty good, though, and I had all the ingredients on hand, so I went to work. I made a batch of cheddar-parmesan rosemary straws, and feeling pretty proud of my concoction, I popped them in the oven. They came out the most fragile and floury things you’ve ever eaten. You literally can’t eat them without a huge glass of water nearby. Not to mention, they absolutely refuse to stay in one piece. Even my kids friends complained.
This is not my first kitchen disaster, and I was undeterred. After a short trip to the gas station for Diet Coke, I started on batch number two. This batch came out of the oven looking beautiful… but they were just as fragile as the first batch, and less tasty.
It was kind of a blow.
On top of it all, I had this photo set-up all ready to go, and I was loving how it looked! Plus, I just bought this crazy cute orange vase-jar-thingy and I could not wait to use it. Can’t you just picture how cute these cheese straws would have looked in it? Gah!! The frustration!!
In the end, I scrapped the recipe, but not the post. Because, just like bad hair days and food stuck in your teeth and accidental flatulence, kitchen disasters happen to everyone. No matter what Pinterest says.
Broken cheese straws and spilled milk are not worth crying over. They’re frustrating and embarrassing, but life moves on. I will master these stupid cheese straws someday, but today I’m going back to the kitchen to make something else. Or, I’ll spend an hour playing Subway Surfers, and we’ll have dinner out and forget the kitchen.
I’d love to hear your comments today. Share your frustrating kitchen disasters and how you recovered.
Because, after all, it’s just cheese straws.
I seriously love the image you made! That cute orange vase looks fantastic with those cheese straws in them. Too bad this one didn’t turn out..it sounds amazing. I tried to make a cake from scratch once and it was the worst thing ever! Nothing about it worked out and in the end I had a crazy big mess to deal with! Ugh! I’ve never tried to scratch bake a cake again. Betty Crocker makes them so easy and delicious for me to go through that emotional turmoil again.
I’m dying over your cheese straws! Brilliant. I should pin these and see if anybody notices LOL
No worries. We all have kitchen disasters. I think you should pin the photo and see how many re-pins you get. Hahahahaha
Jen, I love how you always tell it like it is! You are such an inspiration to people without even knowing it. There are the kitchen disasters that the food doesn’t look that appetizing but it still tastes good, Then there is something to be said about a kitchen disaster that your family sits around the table making terrible faces and decide it would be a better idea to order pizza. Those are the memory makers. If it made a memory, it can’t be all bad? Love your blog girl!
Jonette, you’re too kind! I had one of those dinner disasters not too long ago, that resulted in the family going out to a fast-food place. It certainly was a memory maker! Miss your family tons!
Jen, I love this post! First of all, your photo set-up is kick ass so I’m glad you went ahead and shared the photos. I love the photoshopped cartoon cheese straws – they totally made my day! Second, I totally hear ya. My apartment is always a mess. When I first moved in four years ago, I cleaned like a mad woman every day, determined to keep it clean ‘n pristine. Now with my 11 hour work days, a puppy, and just generally trying to make it through each day without throwing myself off a balcony, things like a clean apartment are my last priority. Dishes are ALWAYS piled high in my sink, laundry is everywhere, there’s a thick layer of dust on my floor. But who cares? I’d rather stay sane than have a show home. As for kitchen disasters, don’t get me started! They always seem to happen when I’m in a time crunch and I have to bring what I’m making to a party. There was a time where I forgot baking soda in my cookies and they didn’t flatten. I forgot an entire cup of flour in a cookie and they were thin as paper after baking. I’ve dropped cakes, I’ve made inedible food. But I love sharing those epic fails on my blog because it shows that I’m human, I make mistakes and I can laugh about it. That’s what’s so refreshing about your post. You’re right – we don’t live pinterest worthy lives most of the time. But the important thing is to shake it off and move on. Thanks for sharing this, Jen!
Perfection? What’s that! Your experience is more like what many of my kitchen concoctions turn into. I totally get it! I’m glad you posted anyway, though.
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one time I forgot to add the flour to my cookies. For real. Who DOES that? They turned into a hot soupy mess. At least I didn’t have my photo shoot set up 🙂
I once made my boyfriend’s favourite honey and chocolate chip cookies (which I have made quite a few times before, and they came out perfect every single time!) But for the very first time, I used baking soda instead of baking powder, cuz though I used baking powder all the time, the recipe recommended baking soda. The cookies came out smelling all delicious and looking beautifully golden.. and tasting like BARS OF SOAP!!!! I don’t know if that’s how baking soda is supposed to taste or if the store owner gave me detergent powder instead of baking soda.. I swear I’m not gonna use baking soda EVER again.